And I'm out !

                   These people want me to leave, fine ! I'm out ! but they are not getting any info from me. My dear "friends" keep asking me where polonius's body is at. Damn sponges, all they do is take orders from that king. Now the king wants to send me to England, so be it. I will just do me. I'm thinking about my revenge and if I should kill the king. I don't know, but I hear Ophelia is going crazy in the castle, crazy bitch, she misses me obviously, haha. Oh, on my way to England, I seen a ship approaching, a pirate ship. I seen my chance to aboard their ship and I did. I ask them if they can bring me back and they did ! I have unfinish business in Denmark. I will return, but first i will warn them I am going un armed. I will send Horatio a letter about my return til then...   

I am about to get em !

So these idiots think I'm "acting" crazy, I AM CRAZY ! They also think I am stupid, yea okay I know the King and Polonius are behind the mirrors. So I'll give them a show. I started babbling about dying and sleeping, then Ophelia shows up. This girl....she is not honest, but I did love her once. Now she can go to a whore house for all I care. She was setting me up ! I ran around the room looking for her father and the King. They were in there, I'm sure of it. It is almost time for the play ! I even told Horatio to watch the King's reaction during the play. My dear friend Horatio I love that guy ! Anyway onto the play, we were all there waiting for the play and don't judge me but I just snapped okay ! I was just excited about this plan I had, did not mean to embarrass Ophelia in front of everyone, nor my mother, but we can all say they are annoying right ? Well the play is going well, wait my favorite part is coming up...damn he poisoned the King. I couldn't even finish the play. Just like I thought the King stopped the play in shock. It got to him ! that means he killed my father right ? Horatio says he looked very guilty watching the play, I got him ! Now my mother wants to speak with me, as we are talking she pissed me off and I just shoved her to the wall and she screams for help. I heard somebody else screaming for help too. I swear I thought it was Claudius, I went through the curtains and started stabbing this man. Damn me ! It was not Claudius, it was Polonius ! Can you believe it, but to be honest I still don't care. I know I did wrong but remember I'm crazy.

                                                                                                   -Hamlet 

I, Hamlet, will get to the bottom of this

                           Well about this morning... I was still in shock that I seen my father's ghost, so I didn't really know what exactly I was doing with my shirt open and pants to my ankles and walking into Ophelia's room and nearly scaring the shit out of her but whatever. She ran to her daddy and her daddy thinks she's sleeping with me... well yea, but she isn't the only one. And what is with Fortinbras attacking Denmark ? He does not have the guts to, but I do I'm Hamlet for Christ sake. Oh ! Don't think I forgot about Polonius, that damn fishmonger. He thinks I'm crazy, pshh he hasn't seen anything yet. My dear friends also came to visit, I was pleased to see them but I know they were sent. Can't trust friends, they came to see my mom's wedding. Anyway I also have players coming to the castle to perform. Finally something that will make me happy. Everything and everyone in this castle is annoying me. Yet, these players are not here just to perform they are here to help find out if King Claudius killed my father. They are going to act out a tragic scheming murder, it should show how Claudius killed my father. If he reacts in anyway I swear I am going to end his life .

-Hamlet

My life sucks.

          Dude, sadly my father died recently and my scheming mother is now marrying my uncle ! My father's brother ! That is really wrong, like mom aren't you suppose to be depress that your husband just died. Noooo, you just had to marry my uncle. He is now the King, "King Claudius", king my ass. That was suppose to be me on that throne. I am so depress the only color I choose to wear is black. Now that becomes a big deal in the house, uhm who the hell cares what color my wardrobe is ?! I'll tell you what one of my "girlfriends'" think its hot, so that's good. Oh, also the guards claim to have seen my fathers' ghost. Back from the dead ? Impossible, I told them to show me and they didn't bluff. That night I went with them, and seen my father. That's pretty damn scary, he had on his armor like if he was ready for war. And I knew it ! he was murdered ! By a douchebag, my uncle, my mothers' new husband. What a punk, he couldn't fight my dad like a real man, oh wait my father was a badass, he would've murdered "king" Claudius in a second. But, my father tells me I must not tell anyone about who killed him, well wait was that really my dad or was it the devil trying to make me kill my uncle ? Idk but I am going to figure this out.
                                                                                                                                             -Hamlet